Saturday, December 6, 2008

So much to say but where does it begin and where does it end?

There's just so much going on I find myself coming here to blog and giving up before I start because it's so exhausting to think about putting it all here at one time. So I guess I'll do it in separate posts, or maybe I'll get started and not be able to stop typing. I never know when I sit down in front of this page. Sometimes things will just start flowing at a pace even I can't keep up with and other times my mind is full but my fingers don't know what to say.

I guess I'll start with the latest on the Hailey/school situation which continues to be a huge stressor in our lives.

Remember how I had received that telephone call from the teen court facilitator? Remember how my idiot self for a minute thought that someone had finally come to their senses and decided that........ oh I don't know........ NO ONE deserves to be beaten up at school? Remember that?

Oh how I was mistaken. As it turns out HAILEY is being charged with a crime. Disorderly conduct and harassment to be precise. I received a letter from the teen court on Thursday informing me that if my daughter follows through with the program and is tried in front of a jury of her peers that this may not have to go on her "record".

I called the teen court facilitator immediately who called me back the next morning. I told her in no uncertain terms that Hailey and I were willing to cooperate but that would be up to and ending at the extent of allowing the victim to be further victimized. Hailey WILL NOT be tried in front of a jury of her peers, she WILL NOT be forced to relive what happened to her and we most definitely WILL NOT allow her to be bullied by a school official and a police officer who have something to prove. I pushed and they pushed back. My ONLY goal here is to protect my daughter, sadly apparently I also have to protect her from bullies who think that being in a position of power gives them the right to bully people.

If at the end of the day, after all is said and done a fair judge decides that Hailey DID deserve to be punched, choked, and thrown on the ground because she said S couldn't catch her than fine. Until then, we try to get through this with as little damage as possible while showing Hailey that if you follow the rules and do what you should and don't allow people to bully you, you walk away with more than they ever tried to take from you.

I'm not sure where the harassment part of it comes from at all. There are a couple incidents I can possibly see that could, if twisted the right way, be made to seem as harassment. There's the time when S called my home 16 times in one day bothering Hailey and I called foster mom and told her to stop her child from calling my house anymore. Maybe me calling her was harassment? ha! Or maybe it was the time S wrote a note in school that foster mom was a horrible b*tch other horrible things and I gave foster mom the note so she could have a talk with S about it since S was obviousely extremely upset. Or maybe it's the time Hailey was at my friend's house and S stood across the street swearing at my friends children and Hailey told her to "just shut up". Or maybe it was when S walked into my house uninvited and I told her to leave NOW and not come back. Maybe if you were really digging for something to pin on Hailey you could use those things as harassment. Maybe.

We meet with the teen court facilitator and 2 resource workers on Tuesday.

Here's a pretty fitting song for the night.... since I probably would have had a lot less problems in this town if we had just conformed to the robotic "norm". Such as

when they forced my left handed child to write with his right hand in kindergarten. I had a problem with that.

When my son's school bus driver came to pick him up talking on his cell phone. I had a problem with that.

When a member of the school board said in a meeting that they prefer to deal with issues (drugs) internally. I had a problem with that.

When my sons third grade teacher told me he needed to be on Ritalin. I had a problem with that

When the principal accused my daughter of having a "power struggle" when he accused her of stealing someone's shoe (no, not shoeS) and she got mad. (the girl lost the shoe and later found it) I had a problem with that

When that same principal told me that my son wouldn't once again be pushed through if he wasn't ready and he finished the school year with straight F's and started 9th grade right on time. I had a problem with that

When my son went to 7th grade not knowing how to add. I had a problem with that

When my daughter got detention for telling her teachers aide that she didn't beleive man actually walked on the moon. I had a problem with that.

Maybe if I had always just been a zombie and never stood up for my kids in this town. Maybe i'd have an easier time of it. But I didn't....

And I'm not sorry. And YOU have a problem with that.


Cure For Kayden said...

They really tried to make you kid switch hands????

i thought that went out with the ark... well at least in the 60's.

one older brother and my elder sister are both left handed, and they went to school in the 70's and to my knowledge were never made to try and swap.

i also have a left hander... she ammuses me, when she started writing she would right chinese style, right to left.

i cant believe that in this day and age they would try to force a child to swap... it boggles the mind.

jay_say said...

From the thing you have said and described, that school system is messed up. Things like that would never fly in my district. We dish out fair punishment for when people break the rules. I understand to an extent about the discipline for fighting but our high school has a no tolerance so both parties receive a suspension... but harrassment charges... from who?