Whoever invented Guitar Hero ROCKS!

But I wonder if I could file some type of civil suit demanding they do the housework I have been neglecting since I can't seem to pry that stupid guitar out of my hands!

If y'all haven't played you really need to go fork over the $100 and get with the program. I, myself, am not a fan of video games but this one is way cool. And hey, if you are of the opinion that video games are bad for kids, consider the hand-eye coordintion they will develop!

We have Guitar Hero 3 for the Nintendo wii, but I've seen the 2nd version on PS2 and it's equally entertaining.

Anyway. I'm working on my reflections for 2007 post. I never make resolutions so I don't have to worry bout that.
Happy New year to all!

Autism... the new ADHD? Plus my theories on SIDS

I want to start off by apologizing for not updating on Chris' tests sooner. I've been insanely busy as I'm sure most everyone is this time of year. His tests went well, we will get the results at our follow up on January 4th.

Autism. Let me preface with saying that I do not, for one second beleive that Autism isn't a very real thing. I truly beleive that my 5 year old could be the poster child for what I call "Autism intervention" in that I beleive that his problems being recognized extremely early and treatment begun before the age of 18 months saved him from "Autism". He is in a mainstream school, in a mainstream class and functions very well in that environment. We weren't always sure he would and 3 years ago we weren't sure he would ever do the things he does now. I hold a dear place in my heart for the people that helped us get where we are with him, his therapists..... I believe they saved my child and my family.

Having said that. The number of children being placed on the "Autism spectrum" is up over 200% in recent years. There are many theories for that, including the theory that there are now better ways to diagnose Autism. But I ask the question, how can you truly diagnose a condition when no one understands what it is, where it comes from, and a condition that has such a broad range of symptoms? You can't. Which is why I believe that we are on the cusp of a new "ADHD era".

What do I mean by that? People my age will likely remember many children in school going to the nurse every lunch hour for pill time. Kids who left for lunch rambunctions and returned calm and collected having received thier dose of Ritalin mid-day. Teachers began "diagnosing" kids who were having even the slightest bit of trouble concentrating or learning as having ADHD and sending parents to pediatricians for pills. Pediatricians began prescribing these powerful pills to almost anyone who walked in the door with a "teacher diagnosis" in hand. These kids, as Ritalin and ADHD became uncool and taboo lived, and to this day continue to live with the stigma of having "ADHD".

How many of these kids really had ADHD? How many of them had other disorders that were not looked into such as oppositional defiant disorder, learning disabilities, metabolic disorders, chemical imbalances, even abuse and neglect in the home or peer abuse situations going on? How many of them continued to live with whatever was plaguing them under the Ritalin fog?

The powers that be seemed to see the forest for the trees in the 90's. New ADHD cases suddenly dropped off as Pediatricians finally began refering these children to psychologists and teachers were no longer allowed to suggest ADHD drugs to parents. Suddenly, with the diagnoses of ADHD decreasing, diagnoses of other "disorders" climbed. The most startling increase? Autism.

There are many theories on what causes Autism. Some beleive it is the preservatives in vaccines, some beleive it is birth or prenatal oxygen deprivation or trauma, some beleive it is food sensitivity or allergy, some beleive it is a metabolic disorder, some beleive it is imbalances of certain chemicals and nutrients, and some beleive it is a glitch or damaged brain. The list goes on and on. Basically, no one really has much of a clue what causes Autism. A lot of parents with Autistic children blame vaccines. I've spoken with one mom who told me "he was FINE until he got his 1 year shots, then suddenly he turned into THIS!" I can see her point. When something happens to your child, say..... he shows you a cut on his finger, you are naturally going to ask him what he was just playing with that cut his finger. What you may not realize is that he cut his finger weeks ago and has just re-opened the sore....

My theory on Autism is that some children are sensitive to something, heck some children are sensitive to everything. My own son had such extreme dry skin (still does) that for the first 3 years of his life I had to MAKE any soap that touched his skin or clothes by hand, on the stove or he would break out in eczema patches that we couldn't get to go away. About a year later I really started to think about that. What was the difference between commercial soap and the soap I made? Heck if anything my soap could have been more harsh because I wasn't as good at regulating the lye to oil ratio as a factory would be with all it's computerized equipment.

Jacksen also had great aversions to food. He ate next to nothing, living mostly on fresh fruits and vegetables. It was about all he would put in his mouth. Then, someone said something to me that was the turning point. She said "Kat, you know when you are pregnant and you have cravings and aversions? Well, you know that's because your body is telling you what it needs and is telling you what it doesn't feel is right for it"....

From that day on, I realized that kids don't eat like we do. They haven't developed the horrid habits we are like clearing our plates or eating food just because it's offered. Kids eat on the "pregnant woman" diet. They, being naturally more in tune with thier bodies, want to eat what thier body is telling them to and balk at or refuse food that thier body is telling them not to eat.

So now I had 2 clues. It was my job to put the puzzle together. What was my child telling me was the problem? What was in commercial soaps and un "natural" foods that my child was telling me he couldn't tolerate? Preservatives.

But why are autistic children seemingly fine until toddlerhood? They are exposed to preservatives in some form pretty much since birth? Well, in my opinion it works on the same principal as the alchoholic who doesn't destroy his liver with his first drink, but rather over a period of months or years of chronic drinking. Children who are sensitive to preservatives don't damage thier brains the first time they are given a bath with Johnson's baby wash, but rather over months and years of exposure to preservatives. It makes sense to me since Autism is a seemingly progressive disease, it doesn't generally happen overnight but slowly, over a period of time. The changes are impossible to detect early on, but as time goes on they become more apparent as they increase in severity. It is our job to put the clues together. What is my child sensitive to or allergic to? We have to do our own scientific experiments and LISTEN to what our children, whether they can speak or not, are trying to tell us.

Just some food for thought. Moving on.

SIDS. It's a 4 letter word that strikes terror in the hearts of parents. We all likely know someone who has put thier perfect, seemingly healthy baby down for a nap or to bed for the night and woke up to find thier little lifeless body in the crib. SIDS is so terrifying because it strikes babies seemingly at random. Sneaking into the nursery and snatching them from thier dreams. Autopsies show nothing out of the ordinary and no cause can be determined. How can this be? How can that child have died and every body system be perfect upon examination?

But there is one organ that can play these sick little tricks. One organ that you really can't know if it was working properly after the fact. The heart. I believe that SIDS is actually a heart condition called Long QT syndrome. Long QT syndrome simply means that for some reason there is a delayed time frame between the Q and the T activities of the heart during the beat cycle. It does not cause any murmurs, it does not cause any blood pressure abnormalities, cyanosis, sweating, chest pains, or any of the symptoms of heart trouble. People with Long QT syndrome sometimes live into thier teenage years or even adulthood only to be found dead in thier beds without having ever been sick. Why? People with Long QT syndrome are at great risk for fibrillation for no apparent reason. The heart, deciding that at this moment to finally realize that the distance between the 2 waves is too long tries to compensate by beating fast and irradically. Soon, it can't keep up with itself and goes into what is called Fibrillation. Erratic, non productive beats. Finally, unable to right itself it simply gives up it's fight and stops.

I truly beleive that most children who die of SIDS could be saved with something so simple as an EKG at birth. An EKG takes less time than the hearing test all newborns in this country get and can detect Long QT and other irregularities in a couple minutes, start to finish. Children diagnosed with Long QT could then be fitted with internal defibrillators, devices that sense when the heart starts acting erradically and step in to give it a mild shock back to reality.

Doctors seem to be catching onto this possibility as recently, when I took Nathan for his echocardiogram I was asked in the history questionaire if there was a family history of SIDS or unexplained death. I asked why and they said that there was a heart problem that can cause this........ Long QT.

If you have a baby, ask your pediatrician to do a simple EKG. It can be done in the office in a few minutes. Even if you have to pay out of pocket, it's worth the knowledge.

Tomorrow is the big day

Christian is currently fasting for his procedures tomorrow and he's not a happy camper! He tried to snatch a cookie this afternoon which I promptly stole from him. Poor boy. He is happy that for once he gets to drink all the sprite he wants, usually the kids don't get soda so that's a perk.

We leave at 7:30 tomorrow for a full day. It's a 2.5 hour drive down and then he has his belly ultrasound at 10. After that we go over to the GI center to listen to all the risks of the procedure and anesthesia. The nurse, Julie, who I had a lengthy phone convo with today will meet us there at noon to start his IV and do his *cringe* enema. The scope will take, from prep to out the door 4-5 hours. So, we should be home by bedtime. Chris was hoping to get McDonalds for supper but the nurse said today that he has to eat soft foods so he doesn't choke following the test so who knows....

Wish us luck that everything goes as planned. I personally am not confident that his problem is a GI problem but we have to rule that out. I feel like all of this has just been one dead end road after another which is frustrating.

The sound no one wants to wake up to

At about 6am we woke up to this sound...... beep, beep, beep.......... beep, beep, beep. The smoke alarms! When we had our basement finished to add bedroom space this spring we had all the smoke alarms interconnected so if one goes off they all do. And this morning we found out that the system works.

Craig and I ran out of bed, me grabbing Nate who had been sleeping next to me and him running upstairs while I got Jack who was already out of bed and running toward his bedroom door. I got upstairs and got he girls up as Craig was up on the second floor getting the big boys up. But wait? Where's the smoke?

False alarm, and we don't really know why but about 30 minutes later it happened again. We found the offending alarm, which was the one outside Austin's room on the 2nd floor and took it down and cleaned it and it hasn't happened since, so hopefully it was just from the alarm being dirty, obviousely there was no fire as I'm currently, at 3:30pm sitting in my home.

OMG what a scary way to wake up. This is the second time we have been rudely awakaned this way since our remodel. The first time was in September when the boys forgot to drain the tub which was overfilled (it leaks slowly if filled past a certain point, it's on the to-do list) and water dripped down all night into the smoke alarm in the basement frying out the smoke alarm....... scary

So now I'm going to be afraid to go to bed tonight. Yeek

Tomorrow is going to be hell day. Christian has to prepare for his tests on Thursday which means that starting tomorrow morning, he cannot eat anything. He won't be allowed to eat from midnight tonight until after his procedure, which will finish up at around 5pm Thursday. Not easy for the kid who gets dizzy and severe stomach aches if he doesn't have solid food in his stomach for more than 3 hours! Tonight I'm making a bunch of Jello Jigglers for him and he'll be eating a lot of chicken broth. It's going to be a challenging day.

Yesterday was Austin's 14th birthday. FOURTEEN! He's now legally able to work for a paycheck in the state of Wisconsin. Time to pay rent! hehe. Nah, we aren't going to send him off into the workforce just yet, he can't even keep his grades above passing. But anyway, his birthday was nice. He got a new skateboard, 4 new xbox games, a new controller, and some cash. We went out to eat at pizza hut with my sister which was nice, we don't eat out often so it's always a special treat. I can't beleive he's already 14. I surely don't feel old enough to have a 14 year old child!

Christmas shopping is nearly complete. Just need to get a few more toys since they seem to somehow be getting a lot of clothes this year again. I can't help it, I love buying clothes! Now onto wrapping it all. They usually get about 15 gifts each so that's 90 gifts to wrap! Then figure in all the stuff for relatives. Oy!

Now that i've had time to think

In working just those couple weeks I have gained a new understanding of working mothers. Maybe not a new understanding really, but I have seen that what I keep saying really is the truth, at least in my eyes.

Y'all miss out SO much! It breaks my heart! I wish no mother had to work outside the home, I really do and I definitely cannot understand why one would choose to if other options are avaialable.

So, I get down on my knees and thank the good lord that he has offered me the choice, even if it means inconvenience sometimes, even if it means we don't eat at fancy restaurants, we don't drive fancy cars, and sometimes we get a little strapped for cash and have to rent a movie instead of visiting the theater. I thank God that he has given me the understanding to see clearly my needs vs my wants and the selflessness to put my wants aside for the greater good of my family.

I love being a stay at home mom. I love the laundry, the whining, the fights, cleaning up the puke (ok, maybe not so much there) and I'm grateful that I have this beautiful life that isn't always.

I'm grateful. Eternally grateful. Who knows, maybe I am less of a person because I'm NOT supermom and I couldn't do it all, I couldn't work and still feel as though I was giving 150% to my kids. I don't know how anyone can. But you know, if working 40 hours a week and missing the little moments is what makes a supermom..... I gladly bow out of the running for that title.

Ramblings

Poor baby can't catch a break. He was starting to get over the roseola and is now down and out sick again! This is over a month now of him getting sick, starting to feel better and getting knocked right back down within days. I feel so bad for him! All he wants is to be held or nursed, which is ok with me but I would love to see him smile and play and EAT... he hasn't eaten decent this entire time!

Christian's appt is now scheduled for next Thursday. We have to be there at 10:15 for ultrasound and then go over to the GI center to prep. All in all it will all take about 6-7 hours. Fun! Poor kid. I really hope they figure it out with this test but I have this awful feeling this is just another stepping stone in our quest.

Shay's Holiday program was last night and was adorable as always. They really do a good job with it, you have to give that music director credit for orchestrating an entire musical play with a couple hundred gradeschool kids. No easy task! We are all done with holiday programs/ concerts now. I guess Hailey got her picture in the paper for being best dressed at the concert or something, I have to get a paper to see for myself.

The dryer is calling my name so I better wrap this up. Speaking of wrapping, I haven't even started! YEEEEEEEEEEEEK. As a matter of fact, I haven't even bought paper yet! double yeeeeeeeeeeeek.

Why do they do this to me!

Ok so my 9 year old has been having some health problems since the beginning of summer and we've been back and forth from this specialist to that trying to get to the bottom of it all. Yesterday was our visit to the ped gastroenterologist where we learned that he thought Chris might have an inflammatory bowel disease like Chrons or something and wanted to do a endoscopy/colonoscopy and take some biopsies as well as an ultrasound to look for anything like tumors and whatever. It was set up for a month from now.

Today I get a phone call saying that the doc had slept on it and doesn't feel comfortable waiting that long and wanted us in THIS FRIDAY (the hosp is 2.5 hours away) and since Craig can't get the time off that quick they are setting up for next wed or thursday instead, I'm waiting on the call back to say which.

The day before the test will be very interesting because he cannot eat for a full 24 hours. How difficult for a kid! Especially Chris since if he gets hungry he starts getting major belly aches and dizzy. Fun Fun.


Hailey's concert was great. She looked beautiful in her dress and I took some pics when we got home. I'll post em on here just as soon as I get them off the camera.

Nate's still not feeling 100% but he's done with the fevers and the rash is almost gone so hopefully he'll soon be back to his old goofy self.

Still working on that post I mentioned at the bottom of the last, haven't had much time to sit down and work on it.

Almost back to normal

Nate's feeling quite a bit better and I've cut my hours down at work to be home with my baby. Shame on me for losing my perspective and putting money over what's important, being home with my kids. I have been praying for forgiveness.

Tonight is Hailey's holiday concert and Thursday is Shay's. I love those things!

Stay tuned for more interesting reading. I'm working on a post about self destructive people who are toxic to those around them. Good reads!

Finally

Nate is finally on the upswing. After 3 days of constant fevers he gave us a sign to tell us what was wrong........ with the rash all over his body. He had Roseola! He's really doing better now thank goodness and finally started eating again. It's so nice to see him smiling and playing again.

Work is crazy this week. Thankfully only a couple more weeks and then I'm done. Then I have to get everything together for my first Natural birth class through the hospital the first week of January. That should be exciting!

Jack had his little preschool Christmas program tonight and it was adorable in the way that only a preschool program can be. He said his parts to the play great, he played the bunny in the story Mittens. I am so proud. You would never know sometimes that he had such a rough start in life with the Sensory Integration Dysfunction, and you'd never know that we once feared he would be autistic. He's an amazing little boy, no doubt.

Anyway, sorry for the lack of updates lately but with working during the day I don't get much downtime.

Very eye opening

Take the time to watch this video. It really makes you realize things.....

Ugh. So Nate's still sick. Worse than before actually. He's been into the clinic twice this past week and then last night we sat in the ER with him until almost 3am. He's now got crazy fevers I can't get down even piggy backing Tylenol and Motrin. All he does is cry and all he wants is to be held. He hasn't eaten in days really. Poor kiddo.

We are under a winter storm watch. All week they've been talking about 8-10 inches of snow here. We have gotten maybe 4? Darn, I was hoping for a storm like we had last winter, where we got 27 inches of snow overnight, that was cool. Doesn't look like we are going to get much more though. I don't care cause I don't have to drive in it, I'm keeping my tired butt in my sweats in my cozy house all weekend long, as much as I really should get some shopping done....... Oh well, that's what the internet and the good ole Visa check card are for hehe.
Interesting, I just had a phone call from someone who sounded like they were from the middle east......... couldn't understand em so I hung up on him..... lol

I'll leave you with a picture of Nathan (left), Brayden, and James from Nov 3.

I was right

So, a lot of you have told me to walk a mile in your shoes before I judge. So I took you up on it...... well not entirely for YOUR benefit...

I took a temporary job, working opposite shift as Craig because I will never, if I have any choice in the matter put my children in daycare, it's just not something I agree with. But I took a temporary job to earn some extra money for Christmas and.......Y'all are missing out. Missing out big time. Thank god it's only temporary. The money isn't worth what is missed when I'm gone, not even slightly.
I fully intend to finish out the job (4 weeks in total) but I'll be glad when it's over.I do like the job. I enjoy it a lot actually. I get to use my brain, I get to socialize, and it's a great place to work full of awesome people. But the price is too high.

Y'all are missing some really special memories. I'm sorry for that.

Exactly how many nights

Is it healthy to go without decent sleep? I'd really like to know.

Nate's been sick now for........... I don't know, weeks. Because of this he coughs himself awake every 45 seconds or so at night and by about 3 am he's given up on sleep altogether. This means that I am forced to give up on sleep as well as he needs someone to cuddle and entertain him at that ungodly hour. My husband, being the greatest dad in the world that he is helps too, but for the most part the 3 of us all just stay awake.

And the snot. If there is one thing on this planet that makes me want to hurl it's THAT kid with the boogers constantly running down their face. Lately, that is my kid. Freaking gross.

And it's not just Nate. They are allllll sick in some way or another. Everything from an earache to being constipated has afflicted this house in some severe form or another in the past 3-4 weeks. The one thing I can be thankful for is that so far, mom and dad have remained fairly healthy.

Turkey day was nice. We went to my moms and stuffed ourselves stupid with all the yummie turkey fixins. And pie. OMG my brother and his wife made NINE pies.... there were 11 people (not counting the babies). We came home with I think 4 full pies. Not that I'm complaining, pumpkin pie has got to be my favorite thing on the planet.

I've been in full fledged de-clutter mode. It seems crap just piles up in this house and I don't really know why. I think I'm a mild hoarder or something. This week I've done approximately 21 loads of laundry. Yes, in one week. The girls removed at LEAST 15 loads from their bedroom floor alone, who knew they had tan carpet? I didn't. And I'm not even done. I probably have another 8 loads or so to go, hopefully I can get them done yet this weekend. I'm not holding my breath. Really, no children need as many clothes as these kids have. I swear I prune their wardrobes on a monthly basis just getting rid of the things we don't LOVE and they still have an insane amount of clothing.

In other news. My "baby" boy shot his first deer yesterday! On his first day EVER of hunting. I'm so proud!

Anyway, Nate's done with his snack and yelling so I guess that's my cue to find something more entertaining for him...

The Pit

The Pit
The day my child died, I fell into the pit of grief. My friends watched me struggle through daily life, waiting for the person I once was to arise from the pit, not realizing "she" is gone forever.
The pit is full of darkness, heartache and despair, it paralyzes your thoughts, movements and ability to ration. The pit leaves you forever changed, unable to surface the person you once were.

Some of my pre-grief friends gather around the top of the pit, waiting for the old me to appear before their eyes, not understanding what’s taking me so long to emerge. After all, in their eyes, I've been in the pit for quite sometime. Yet in my eyes, it seems as if I fell in only yesterday.
Not all of my pre-grief friends are gathered around the top of the pit. Some are helping me with the climb out of the darkness. They climb side by side with me from time to time, but mostly they climb ahead of me, waiting patiently at each plateau. Even with these friends I sometimes wonder if they are also waiting for the pre-grief me to magically appear before their eyes.
Then there are the casual acquaintances, you know the ones who say, "Hi, how are you?" when they really don't care or really want to know. These are the people who sigh in relief, that it is my child who died and not theirs. You know...the "better them, than me" attitude.

My post-grief friends (and a rare pre-grief friend) are the ones who climb with me, side by side, inch by inch, out of the pit with me. They are able to reassure me when I need reassurance, rest when I need resting, and encourage me to move forward when I don't have the strength. They have no expectations, no memories and no recollection of how I "should" be. They want me to get better, to smile more often and find joy in life, but they also accepted the person I've become. The "person" who is emerging from the pit.

Author Unknown

Sniffle sniffle, cough cough

Everyone is sick to some degree here. Winter is upon us I guess! Poor little Nathan seems to be hit the hardest at this point, poor guy.

Almost Turkey day! I love eating holidays hehe. We are going to my moms this year, we had our feast with Craig's family on Sunday.

I'm realizing since I'm so tired this morning, this post is really boring lol I can't think of anything to write but yet I want to write. So y'all get to suffer through it I guess.

I've been doing as much research as I can on Shaylin's DVD. I can't find a whole lot of information and most of what I understand is written in eye-nese and even having taken medical terminology it's still greek to me. Words like Sursumduction........ what the schmeckle is a sursumduction? I think they make these words up to make themselves appear smarter, that's what I think.

I'm using the rest of this week to get caught up on laundry, wish me luck. For about 2 seconds I contemplated dragging my butt out of bed at 5am for the black friday deals but then came to my senses. My mom will be going so if I come across something I can't live without I'll give her some cash to get it.

Bitter old hag

Gosh I've been posting like a mad woman lately. Oh well.

As I've been sitting here for the past little bit reading some caringbridge sites of kiddos we either knew when we were in the joint, or who we have come to "know" through those we knew I have been reflecting and thinking about me, my positions on things...

I notice I've been bitter lately. Lately being the past couple years or so. Alex would be coming up on turning TWO now you know. TWO! It astonishes me that 2 whole years have nearly gone by... anyway back to my point.

I've been bitter, I've been angry, I've been downright pissed off. But you know what? Who wouldn't be? I have to talk to people, see people, and hear about people who take what they have for granted. They go about their day. They go to work and spend 2 hours a day with their families and somehow that is ok. They just don't realize how quickly EVERYTHING can be gone.

I'm simply sick and tired of people who take it all for granted. Every single morning I wake up and nearly cry because my kids are still here for one more day. Every night I go to bed begging God to give me another day. I have learned the hard way that people don't stay here forever. So many people don't think they take it for granted but they DO. You can see it in their day to day lives.

I guess I get so angry about certain issues because I know what it feels like to just wish you had that 1 more day. I wish I didn't need to sleep during those 7 weeks, I wish I didnt' leave him for a second to eat, use the bathroom, whatever. But I did. Those things I really did HAVE to do. People walk away from their kids every day for things they don't HAVE to do and I can't fathom making that choice.

People worry about such stupid shit. They worry about sports games and shopping and if their dry cleaning will be ready by 5. Why? What the hell does any of that stuff matter? It consumes people's lives and I can't figure it out. WHO THE HELL CARES?! Is your home standing? Is your heat working? Is your family safe and healthy? Then get down on your damn knees and thank the lord above.

It's just really frustrating. Yep I'm angry and bitter and all that other stuff. But I'm grateful and happy too. I don't take one minute for granted anymore. It's been said that I am a changed person since Alex died. Well of course I am! I'm a whole lot different than I use to be. I know I've become a lot less tolerant and likeable. My mission in life isn't to make everyone else happy, i'm sorry to say. It's to make my life and that of my family the most rewarding it can be.

I'm still learning. I'm learning who I was, I'm learning who I am, and I'm learning who I want to be. Forgive me if I confuse or anger you in that process but it's a ride you can't join me on. It's a ride that won't be over for a long time and maybe I'll never figure things out. You have the choice to ride it beside me or to stray away. I don't have any choice in the matter but you do, use it. Don't pretend, don't patronize, and don't make my grieving/learning/growing process about you, it's not. It's about me and it's a very difficult path to follow because there's never a straight line........ the path zig zags, loops, and sometimes just simply turns around and goes back where it came from. All I know is that for right now I am sorting things out and I am keeping those close to me as close as I can.

I cannot beleive...

It's almost Thanksgiving! Which means it's almost CHRISTMAS! Where did fall go? Was there one? I think I missed it.

Guess who is full fledged-into everything- keeping mommy on her toes CRAWLING? Omgoodness it's been a while since I've had a crawler in the house. It's soooo neat though to see him just gloat that he can get around. He totally skipped scooting and had us worried because he didn't even roll back to belly up until about 8 months! He's already pulling up and cruising on furniture too..... smartie.

Today we went to my brothers house to take his family photos and pics of the boys for the holidays. It's always an exhausting trip simply because it means 3 hours on the road round trip. The kids generally start fighting around mile 10. It's really amazing how claustrophobic a Suburban can feel when half its occupants are trying to kill each other.

Although my brother and sil might kill me. I've been resisting the urge to share some pics of their baby I took a couple weeks ago. I can't resist anymore... So I'll leave you with a couple pics of my gorgeous nephew Brayden.

This blog..

There is something that you all must understand about this blog. This blog may be public on the internet, but it is ultimately your choice whether or not to read it and beyond that it's your choice to take what I say and use it, take what I say and dump it in your little trash bin in your mind, or take what I say and get angry about it, misinterpret it, or use your insecurities about it to attack me. I leave those choices to you, as adults.

One thing you must understand is that as my blog, these opinions are my own. They are not directed at one person in particular, I have never said "(name) is a bad mother in my opinion because they do A, B, C" My statements are generalized and pertain to what I feel are problems in the greater "us". I ALWAYS include myself in that US as well as you will see me say, many times over that WE are failing our own.

Now, when you take what I write and comment, email, instant message or otherwise you take YOUR opinions on things and bring them to me on a personal level. When YOU make it personal in that way you then must expect that I will direct my response toward YOU. It's only fair. I adore comments. I have always been a big fan of debate and I love to learn. My opinions on things have been known many times over to evolve and occasionally come right out and change when new information is presented to me. However, when you DO make it personal by direct contact you MUST be willing to then be mature enough to accept my direct comments to YOU in return. You have the choice to take it to that next level or not.

This blog is an extension of my home. Ask yourself, if we were face to face and you came into my home and I had something written on a peice of paper, in open view on my kitchen table, would you comment on it? Maybe you would, and that would be your right since I left it in plain view for all to see. And maybe that wouldn't be a bad thing. But I would expect that you would use discretion, that you would allow me the opportunity to respond to what you say to me, and that we would have a conversation about it. Yet many of you cannot do the same here.

I've been accused of being a martyr, a hypocrit, a narcassist, etc. Those things don't bother me. I understand they are written out of anger and hurt at something that you feel was directed at you and some of us are more articulate than others and do not need to do nasty things, or even say nasty things in order to get our point across. All I ask is that when you take what I say and interpret it (usually incorrectly at least somewhat) and then bring your interpretation to me I WILL defend my position. It seems people often think that if they just email me, or comment about how the world is unfair to them then I will say "ok YOU are the exception".

I got an email yesterday from someone who I didn't even know read this blog. Someone who I will likely know and have frequent contact with for the rest of my life. The email was written in a mature, articulate way and my response was as such as well. We both made clear our position and realized that although we live differently, we THINK a lot alike. There are no hard feelings and nothing to dispute, argue, or work out to save our relationship. I only wish more of my readers could be so mature.

Please remember. What is written here isn't written for your benefit. It's for mine. This blog IS sometimes a place for me to share bits about my family and friends and home and life, but often its a place for me to let out some of the stuff crowding my brain, stuff that I worry about immensly so that I can sleep at night. Usually the words fly off my fingertips faster than I can think them.

I will never censor my feelings and thoughts meant for this blog to be politically correct or so some crybaby in the corner who isn't happy with their current life isn't reminded of that fact. If you are unhappy CHANGE IT. In almost EVERY nasty email or comment I get, I can find the same words "I WISH X were possible for me, but it's not so I Y" and in the next breath they tell me they are happy with their decisions. If you wish X were true and settle for Y then you aren't happy, no matter how hard to try to convince me (or yourself?) you are. If you aren't happy, CHANGE IT.

People usually also assume one of 2 things about me. That because we have 6 kids we are dirt poor and I send the kids out dumpster diving for beans while I sit and watch soaps or the opposite, that we somehow have more than they do and that's how we live on one income. Neither is true. I dont' know how many emails I've gotten that have said "Kat, you just TRY living on what we do or what we would on $XXXX" and I have to laugh because the number is generally around the same, if not more than we live on. It's really not about how much or how little you have, it's about choices. You almost always have a choice. If your rent/mortgage is $1200 a month, find a cheaper house. If that's not possible in your area..... MOVE! If your car payment is $900 a month sell it and buy something cheaper! If your grocery bill is $700 a month shop at Aldi, clip coupons (or print em online!), ask local butchers about deals, they generally sell meat that the animal owner didn't want for a LOT less than you'd pay at the grocery. GET CREATIVE. Sure, some of these things aren't easy, ideal, or even pleasant to think about or to undertake. But you have to prioritize, you have to ask yourself what is more important to YOU, and whatever that is make it happen. Stop living in this "pity me" mentality and take control of your life, even if it means making the hard decisions.

A couple people brought up to me yesterday the question "What about people who choose to work for their own sanity?" I happen to have known one of these people. When she was a stay at home mom she was constantly frazzled, stressed, and yelling. When she went back to work the time with her kids was more calm, collected, and productive. Did work fix that for her? Probably not. Being away from the kids for a little bit of time probably did. We all need breaks. However there is a fine line between taking a break and using a job as an excuse to get away from it all. If you are using your job to hide from your kids a job isn't what you need, some support and maybe even a psychiatrist might be in order.

There are also the people who really DO need to work. I will never, and would never discount them or what they do. Single parents definitely need to work. People who have no health insurance if not through their employer definitely need to work (lest they start using the ER as a clinic and racking up bills they can't pay). I'm sure there are more groups that I'd stick in this category but I need to move on or I'll lose my train of thought lol

There is also the issue of feminism and traditional values. I'm all for women being seen as equal to men and definitely beleive they should make as much as men for doing the same work. However I think in our fight for equal rights, superior rights, what-have-you we have taken something away from ourselves. We have taken away our right, when looking at each other, to do what we were biologically created to do which is to bear and nurture children. Of course, in the eyes of the laws etc we still have the "right" to do this, but as a group of women we do not. We do not allow each other to do this, as we have the added pressure now of being just as good as men in the workforce and earning the same, if not MORE money than them. If someone is staying home with their children, they are holding back the greater group... they are stuck in traditional ways and not doing their part.

I am a traditional beleiver. I beleive primarily that men are biologically engineered to hunt/gather, and women are to birth/nurture. It's how we are built on a cellular level. Can a man be a stay at home dad? SURE! Can he be a wonderful stay at home dad? DEFINITELY! FAthers have come a long way from the men in the 50's who didn't hold a baby til they were 2 lest the break them, who never changed a diaper.... ok most men, but anyway I think as we have drifted more into what was traditionally "man territory" they have, maybe by default drifted into what was traditionally ours as well. It's not all a bad thing ;) And if a father is willing to stay home and parent his children while his wife earns the money than I say WTG DAD! However this is still traditionally and biologically the mothers role and for ME and MINE it's what we incorporate into our home.

One thing I do beleive in that contradicts traditional living is that I beleive every woman should have some marketable skill. Do you have to work to get/maintain them? Nope! Take a couple online classes every year, volunteer at your kids' school, move up the ranks in the PTO, help organize things in your community. Your resume can be filled with a lot more than employers. I haven't worked much but I have been told by employers that my resume is exceptional, both because of the volunteer things I do and because I took a class on writing resumes online once hehe I really beleive this is important as we don't know what will happen tomorrow and we need to be prepared to financially support the children we bring into this world alone if the need arises.

Another thing people assume is that my husband is "forced to work long, hard, extra hours" to put food on our table because I don't work. Does my husband work long, hard, extra hours? Sure. Ask anyone what summer is like around here and they will tell you. But if we didn't have 6 kids he'd STILL HAVE TO DO IT because it's the career he chose. The tourists don't come to gawk at our 6 children, they wouldn't care if we had 2, they come to eat and drink. That's what they do and someone has to cook for them. My husband chose his career 17 years ago, before any of our children were even dreamt up. He worked long hard hours then too. That's what his job asks of him and it's not a career he's "stuck" in because we have 6 children, it's the career he chose based on what he likes to do.


Probably the biggest obstacle for people is want vs. need. My local freecycle is a prime example of people misunderstanding the 2 terms. Posts such as "Needed desperately! Swingset!" or "Needed: car that has less than 100k miles on it" These things aren't NEEDS, yet people consider them as such and are seemingly unable to survive another day without them. Sit down for a minute and take inventory of your TRUE needs in life. The list is very short.


Then there is that gray area of things we don't NEED to survive but that make us somewhat normal in todays society and allow us greater productivity. Things such as cars, internet, telephone.

Then of course you move on to wants. Anything that doesn't sustain your life is essentially a want. Your job in life is to figure out the balance between how many wants you wish to aquire in life and how much you plan to enjoy them and the people around you. We all do that. For me, enjoying the people around me trumps most things I think I want.

Nate needs to eat so CIAO!

moving on...

Ok, now that the drama is, as far as I'm concerned over I'll post about more important things than some sniveling idiot who attacks websites of lost babies as a way to make herself feel better. There were just 2 comments from her in my email box that were promptly deleted without being read.... I don't feel the need to consume myself with people like that and I won't torture y'all with it either. I have no problem discussing my views, but when someone does the things she's done they no longer deserve my attention.

So, moving on. We all had our annual eye exams yesterday. A wonderful 3 hours in the eye doctors office! UGH! I think next year we should split the appts up instead of doing them all on one day, the kids get sooo restless in there for so long and I don't blame them!

Same old same old, my prescription got stronger, so did Austin's. Craig still just needs reading glasses (no fair!) and Hailey now needs glasses. The interesting stuff is with Shay.

Some of you may remember last year me talking about how the eye Dr said she had something peculiar with her eyes, one was higher than the other and she appeared to have "shut down" her left eye completely. We then got a second opinion who said that he didn't know what was wrong with her except that she didn't appear to have much vision in EITHER eye. For now we'd have to wait and see how it played out since she seemed to be functioning great in school and all (she's my lil smartie pants!)

Well, it turns out it's even more peculiar than originally thought. She has an eye condition called Dissociated Vertical Deviation, DVD. Which is also called Alternating Sursumduction.

I'm still trying to learn more about it online, it's quite rare and her form seems rarer yet but I'll explain it as best I can. Think of a fish...... you know how a fish sees out of one eye at a time because if it saw out of both it would see 2 different things and its brain wouldn't know how to process the image(s)? That's how Shaylin sees. She sees out of one eye at a time and her brain switches between them depending on what it wants to focus on. She literally shuts one eye off while keeping the other on and then flips subconciousely. The only effect she gets is the occasional short lived blur as the newly switched "on" eye adjusts to the light, much like how when you wake up in the morning the world is hazy for a moment.

You can literally watch this strange phenomenon happen in her too, as the eye doctor showed me by having her look at a small object and then covering each eye one at a time. When you cover her left eye and have her look at an object and then remove the cover and place it over the OTHER eye the eye that's turns "on" does a sudden, small downward shift while the eye that is turned "off" stays fixed. It's really interesting.

Her vision is actually great in both eyes, 20/20. IF you happen to get lucky and examine the "on" eye in order, in the "off" eye her vision is next to zero until it's switched on and then it's 20/20. Wierd huh?

This apparently happened because her eyes are congenitally (from birth) misaligned every so slightly. To look at her you'd never even notice but when, as a baby she saw with both eyes she saw double because of this so her brain chose to allow one eye to turn off to correct the image it was seeing. Shay's case is more rare because of the sustained vision in both eyes. Normally the brain will completely, usually irrepairably turn off one of the eyes, never to have sight again. In her case somehow she was allowed to retain perfect vision in BOTH eyes while seeing unilaterally.

Long term this does have some implications. She will never be a fighter pilot, she may or may not drive due to having terrible depth perception. You need bilateral (2 eyes) vision to have depth perception so her's is really bad.

Confusing? yep. Interesting? definitely.........

And the coward comes out...

You can read her latest comment in the comments section of the previous post... then return here to read my response....

Well Katie, I'm thrilled that you finally had the nerve to come out. After the hateful posts on my deceased son's caringbridge site, the hateful comments here... the de-activation of his angel site. I'm glad you finally had the nerve to tell us who you are after all this time.

I think you make a lot of assumptions about me and my life. I think you take what I say, use it to feel sorry for your choices and turn it into a hateful attack because you aren't happy in your own life.... I'm sorry for that.

Have I once said my children can't go on field trips? Or that I can't pay for thier college? There's a lot you assume. In fact my oldest son's college (Harvard if he wants!) has been paid in full since the day he was born..... You ask me if I think my children are going to care about me being home or them being breastfed when they don't have the money for field trips or something...... actually at the end of the day I do. There have been times when my children't haven't gotten something they wanted, whether that be because of finances or because they simply havent' gotten it and when they are 30 I don't think that not getting a power wheels car when they are 4 is going to matter much. I think they will much better appreciate the values instilled in them by our lifestyle much as I don't regret that I never went to disneyland as a child but I remember having a MOM at home. And you ask about the older children wondering why we keep having kids when money is tight. I wish you could sit down and talk to my older children, you'd be amazed by what you would learn! In response to these 2 questions I have a one for you..... when, in your mind, did money become more important than life?

You say you want to give your child a "better" life. But what is that? I mean, what is the hard and fast definition of a better life? I don't think that answer is the same for everybody. To me, a better life is a life with the security of being cared for by your parents..... the feeling of crawling on moms lap whenever you need a hug. To me, a better life does not involve material extras. Having to wait until 6pm every night to tell your mom about your day does not sound to me like a "better" life. The old addage "you can't take it with you" rings in my mind. On my death bed I want my children to say to me "mom, thank you for being there" and not "mom, thanks for giving me $20 for my 3rd grade field trip".

Do I gloat that I have 6 healthy children? You bet! I am eternally greatful for them and am very proud of thier accomplishments. Those children have been to hell and back with losing their brother. They have held his lifeless body in their hands. They were yanked from school to a strange city, then yanked back in the blink of an eye and they adjusted better than you or I ever would have. When I look at my 6 children I feel pride that brings tears to my eyes.

There are people who read this blog, who I either know personally or who I have spent many years close with online that feel attacked by this blog now and then. The difference between you and them is that they don't hide. They have no problem saying to me "ya know Kat, you were out of line and here's why".... 99% of the time we both come to realize that it wasn't what I said that got them, it was their perception of it or their own personal demons being brought out by my words. I have an inkling it's probably the same for you.

You said in your comment that maybe with a part time job I could buy more and do a little less scrimping and saving. Apparently you missed my point entirely. Lets get this part out of the way...... my children have never gone without food. My chest freezer is currently filled with 1/2 a cow and an entire pig, and generally stays that way. As far as less scrimping and saving. Why would I trade using an entire dryer sheet for being home to see my smiling children come in the door after school? Why on earth would I trade having STUFF for being here and watching them grow? To me, that doesn't even make sense! If there ever came a time when my children were not getting what they needed you can bet your ass I'd be out there filling out a Mcapplication to flip a couple Mcburgers. But to leave my children just so I can have more material things...... in my opinion that's not only stupid, but neglectful. When I gave birth to my children I didn't say "oh, ok God... I'll do this parenting thing full time until the day comes when I feel I need satin bedsheets"

My husband and I made the decisions we made long ago based on both our upbringings. You seem to assume that we know nothing about life, so let me clue you in.

My husband grew up in a family where his mother was primarily home until he went to middle school. His dad, as a business owner traveled a lot and the boys didn't see him much. My husband remembers having the money to buy new things, but wishing he could see his dad. Then when his mom started working he'd come home to an empty house that felt so hollow....

My mom was on welfare most of my childhood. Until I was 12 to be exact. Up until that age I really had no idea that we were poor. We still got toys, at Christmas under the tree was filled so much for just my sister and it took hours to open gifts. Mom figured things out. She was always there when I had a scraped knee or needed help with something. Sometimes we would go out driving on the back country roads and get out to pick flowers or lay down and look at the clouds and figure out what the shapes looked like.
Then when I was 12 she decided to make life "better" for us. She moved us to a new city and started working 1, 2, sometimes 3 jobs. I was left to parent my siblings. In the morning for school I woke up at 5am to get my siblings ready and fed, take my then toddler brother to daycare, my sister to grade school........ usually walking in 10 minutes late for school myself. After school was more of the same. I picked them up, helped with homework...... bathed and fed them and then did my homework. I would cry often in the evenings just wishing there were someone there to help ME with MY homework. To help me with MY problems. I felt completely alone....... and essentially I was. My mom was out working to make us more financially secure but you know I never felt more deprived of what I needed or wanted. Sure we now had money for STUFF, but I needed a parent! Instead I turned to the bottle and spent my teenage years drunk. I got pregnant at 16 and vowed my child would not live the same life.

There have been times in my life where I have had to, or even chosen to work. In fact, a daycare provider saw my daughters first steps, she heard my daughters first word. A few years ago I worked at a portrait studio and one day I got a phone call at work by the guidance counselor at my daughters school. When I got there my daughter told me a story I had hoped I'd never hear....... my 8 year old looked me in the eye and said "mom.... I'm sad because you work now and when I get home from school you aren't there"

The fact of the matter is. Everyone has to sacrifice something and no one can do it all. I currently volunteer at an afterschool program at my kids' school and you know what? Most of those kids go there because it's a way for thier parents to get some free daycare after school. My kids light up when they see me walk into the building because it's time they get to spend with me, these other kids don't have that and it breaks my heart. I get to go on field trips with my kids........ they are so proud. Last year I went on a field trip with my sons class and a little boy said to me "Christian is lucky, my mom can never come because she has to work" Oh how those parents miss out! But what they don't see is that their children are missing out too. Kids are so proud to show thier parents off and to spend that time with them!

You are sadly mistaken to think that I'm hateful because other people who work and have more cash have something I don't. Quite the opposite actually, I feel bad for them because they don't have what I DO! I may not drive a fancy car and I may be paying for college until the day I die but I have this time with my children. I would not for a second trade anything I have for something material and I will gladly take the weeks of money being tight for the honor of being here with my children. As I've said many times, WE are failing our children. A lot of people mistake that saying for something it's not. A lot of people make it personal, it's not. A lot of people think when I say that I am condemning them as bad parents, I'm not. As a society...... the greater WE is failing our own. We put so much pressure on each other to keep up with the Jones' and we have such a skewed perception as to what is the standard when it comes to finances that we don't support each other. We don't allow each other the comfort in knowing that sacrificing extras so our children can have the security of a parent at home is ok, much as you have proven. And I'll say it again, sometimes both parents HAVE to work. I get that... I blogged about the welfare system and finances a month or so ago (maybe more lol time gets away from me)...... it's extremely difficult for even 2 working parents to make ends meet in this country, is that the fault of those parents? No WAY! It's OUR fault as a country, as a society, our government, our me me me me me money money money money mentality. Until things change in this country, which they might never..... children and parents will miss out on their fundamental rights and needs. It's a sad truth.

I feel very fortunate that my husband works hard and earns the money necessary to keep this household running and the bills paid. I realize how blessed I am and if that comes out as gloating then so be it. I am proud of him and HIS sacrifice to do what we feel is right by our children.

Before you think you know my story......... walk a mile in my shoes. Before you take what I say and let your own securities circle in your mind....... ask questions. I have yet to have a person who reads this board and thinks negatively continue to do so once their questions have been answered, it's always the ones who assume......... and assume incorrectly that have the issues.

I'm sorry you take what I say personally. I'm sorry that you have to try to convince yourself that "stuff" is valuable to you because of the sacrifice you make in working. It's a defense mechanism for sure and I'm sorry you have to rely on it. I hope that someday you can truly become secure in your decision, even IF that decision is to work and provide your children with stuff over your company.... if that's what is right in your mind then it is. But by doing the things you've done....... the nasty comments, the de-activaton of Alex's site..... I am assured that you aren't as comfortable in your own heart as I wish you could be. You are angry with me for 2 reasons I suspect...... your insecurity being one and jealousy being another. The things you said to me in your last comment....... I'm quite certain those are things you feel about yourself. It usually works that way.

Rest assured my kids do not miss out on anything that will scar them. They have xbox's, psp's, Nintendo ds's, Wii, a trampoline, a huge massive swingset/jungle gym......... they get to go to school dances, field trips, movies with their friends. They wear brand name clothes and have tv's with cable in their rooms (ack! I know!)........ They will go to college if that's what they choose. Whatever it is you think they do without, please let me know because to ask them, or me, they have too much stuff already!

You, Katie........ are a sad sad case to do the things you've done. Attempting to take away my children's memories of their brother by shutting down his site. Some of them are young enough that those words, the journal entries there are the only way they will get to know his life. You tried to take that away from them because of your own demons. Maybe some counseling would be in order. I hope you find the help that you need to ultimately be happy. I hope that someday you can "gloat" about your children and your life too. You are SO young, you have so much to learn in life. Don't try to have it all figured out so early, take each day as a lesson and learn from it.

Rest assured, I'm happy. I'm thrilled to be living the life I am. It aint always beautiful.......... but it's a beautiful ride.

Cowardess

I have a person who frequents my blog who has a very deep dislike for me. Likely the same person who attempted to sabbotage Alexander's caringbridge site over the summer and who made ugly comments on his site about a month ago. The newest comment you can find under the previous post.

I have to ask you, my friend.... what is SO bad in your life that you throw yourself SO deeply into mine? You have such a problem with the things I say, yet you keep coming back here and reading it! You have the power to choose. It's quite simple actually.

All I have to say about your comment directly is at least ONE of us has the guts to put our name on what we write. Why have opinions and than not have the nerve to state your identity? Coward.

Moving on a little. The troll touched on this subject in her comment as well. Why do people assume that people with large families are poverish? Why do people assume that we "keep having kids we can't afford?" How the hell do you know what we can and cannot afford? Do you have a copy of my bank records?

We own our home, a 14 room home with 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms at that. We have 3 vehicles. Sure the 1995 Suburbulac is aging but it's only got 140k on it and runs great. We haven't updated it because quite honestly I love my Chevy 350...... I know how to work on em! hehe. Grew up sitting on old 350 motors with my uncles.
Our other cars are a 1998 Chevy Venture and a 2003 Saturn. We have cable, internet, telephone, all that wonderful newfangled technology. All our bills are paid on time. And we do all of this on ONE income because we feel it is of the utmost importance that our children walk into the house after school to a parent and not to an empty house or a daycare provider.

Sure, now and then we get in a pinch. Who doesn't? Why is it that when someone with 1 or 2 kids has a little financial slump the world understands, but when someone who has 4 or more does it irresponsible?

At the end of the day it is not children who are expensive, it's lifestyles. If we didn't have 6 children we would still have a mortgage, we'd still have insurance, we'd still have a couple cars, we'd still have lights, cable, internet, telephone, water, sewer and gas. We'd still have to go to the doctor, we'd still have to eat.

Sure, because of our belief that one of us needs to be home with the kids we have to budget a little better. We have to get creative sometimes and to us money is never expendable. We have to get creative and we have to keep in perspective what in life is important.

I admit, I do some things that most of you do not to save money but to me those sacrifices mean NOTHING compared to the benefits of doing them. Here's a few...

I cut my dryer sheets in half.... yes folks I do. They work just as well and last twice as long
I cloth diaper my son. It's not pins and plastic pants anymore folks.
I breastfeed! shocker eh?
The kids and I like to play board games or Nintendo Wii for fun, cheaper than going to the rink or the movies and twice as fun!

Would I like to have a couple thousand to spare after the bills each month? Not really. Why? Because no one has a perfect life, everyone has to struggle with something and if extra spending money is the one thing in my life I struggle with........ I'm a blessed woman.

We believe wholeheartedly in God's greater plan. We take his word seriousely and we believe with everything we have that children aren't the burden they are seen as, they are a blessing...... 2 or 20 of them. I am grateful that God trusts me enough to allow me the honor of raising 6 (or more!) of his children. I must be doing something right to receive such a gift! I'm just so glad God didn't put YOU in charge of my fertility. You may judge me for my large family but God's opinion is about the only one that matters and the fact that I have 6 kids means he doesn't think I'm doing half bad!

The difference between my family and yours is that we have to fight harder for everything in this world because people look down on us. Everytime one of my children has a struggle in life they are judged harder than the child next to them because of our large family. They understand that and they know that they have to try just a little harder in life. Are they going to screw up? I surely hope so! That's how people learn and gain knowledge. But they are aware that they are going to be scrutinized every step of the way and when they are all grown they will likely be better people because of it.

Craig and I are judged very harshly. Especially in this community we live in that is so fake you can almost peel the plastic skin off people. This town, I like to joke that it's a tiny LA because it's so full of snobs and fakes it's hysterical. A lot of the townsfolk have more money than brains. Fortunately for us, the reputation of this town makes property values cheap and our house costs us less to live in than about anywhere else we could go! So thanks to the people of this town for that!

I'd like to leave off with the fact that I may critisize how we as a society handle ourselves, but I have NEVER personally attacked anyone on this blog. You may take what I write as an attack, but that is simply due to your own insecurity. So to call ME out because you feel bad about your choices is sad...... why not take all that energy and fix your own life?

So. hate me if you want to.......... love me if you can. Right now I have to go take care of my baby who just woke up......... daycare doesn't do that for me!

I'm a little behind on this one but Go Evenflo!

While visiting one of my favorite blogs, the Motherwear breastfeeding blog this morning I found this article.

Evenflo aquires Evenflo Acquires Leading Breastfeeding Product Line Ameda

Evenflo will be removing all bottle/nipple images from thier website as well as ceasing ALL bottle related advertising to consumers in an effort to become WHO compliant (you can read the story of the WHO code here).

If reading the last link was your first introduction to the Nestle boycott, please familiarize yourself with it here.

One of my favorite infant product companies once again outdoes itself! Way to go Evenflo!

New cold medicine recommendations for children- More problems?

So I'm sure you all know about the cold medicine recalls and all that. If not here's the jist. Some babies/kids died or had adverse reactions from cold medicines. ALL of these reactions were caused by improper dosing (ie parent error) but they yanked all of them anyway.

Craig and I were talking about it the other day and he mentioned wondering if we could still get our Dimetapp elixer, a med we ALL take (I think it works the best on adults too) and I said that I'm sure we could still get it, what would probably happen is that instead of, on the dosing instructions it saying "under 2 yrs consult physician" it would probably now be changed to age 6.

This is going to cause MORE deaths. On a message board I frequent there was a thread asking other parents if they still intended to give thier children cold meds despite the new recommendations. Nearly everyone said they would.

So, what's going to happen here? We are going to have parents stabbing blindly at the dose, overdosing thier childrens and wind up with far more deaths than there were originally.

NM the fact that I think children are WAYYY overmedicated anyway.

Also. I saw on a news station a segment on "what should you do for your childs cold" and they recommended using saline/nose suckers and things like vicks vapo rub and vapo mist. But Vicks vapo rub is made with Eucalyptus (which gives it it's power) and Euacalyptus can cause FATAL breathing supression in children under 2........

Again, why aren't the parents being held responsible for thier own errors. How many kids are going to suffer and possibly die now because we can't hold parents accountable?

Everybody dies famous in a small town

I remember back......... wayyyy back circa 1994 getting my last high school yearbook. They had a section where they asked seniors what they planned to do after high school and I distinctly remember one cheeky chap saying

"Read the police log to see what my friends are up to".

Now, for those of you who actually have NEWS that goes on in your town filling your newspaper, a police log is the most popular part of a small town newspaper. It's where they put a sampling of 911 calls from the week. Usually your town is small enough that you can even tell who in town the call came from. Some are just plain hysterical so I thought I'd share some of them with you. These are actual calls, my comments are in red.


6:46 a.m.-P------ L---- --th Street caller advised the dog has returned from last night and is on the deck of her house growling at her. Town chairman advised he did cage up the animal yesterday, but it got out by jumping an 8-foot fence. 7:17 a.m., officer advised the dog is caught and will be kept in the back of a truck...... Where else would you keep a stray dog? I don't know... the pound???

10:32 a.m.-City of C----- B----- Lake caller advised there are some people shooting guns on the south side of the lake. Officer advised; everything is fine. Of course it's fine...... they were only 22's!

10:30 a.m.-Officer reported he found another poached buck just north of -----Street in P----- Lake township. The antlers, hind quarters and loins were taken. 10:44 a.m., officer made contact with a male subject who told the officer the deer had been hit by a vehicle. He was advised it is still illegal to butcher the deer without getting it tagged first. Subject was told to contact DNR officer.... ewwwwwwwwwwww


8:12 a.m.-C----- officer ran a license plate on a vehicle parked at a café that has a traffic cone stuck underneath. Officer advised to call the cafe and tell the vehicle owner that the cone is there and to drop it off at the police department. Red alert! traffic cone theft!

3:52 a.m.-C----- --th Avenue caller advised they had a subject come to their door asking for help as he put his vehicle in the ditch. Units advised. 4:06 a.m., background checks show current ------ County, -------- and ---- counties have warrants on subject. 4:11 a.m., subject is in custody and en route to jail. Officer advised subject also had some THC and will be charged with possession. Mental note. Get rid of stash before calling the cops when your stoned ass puts your car in the ditch.

1:55 p.m.-C----- caller requested an officer because a subject employed by a repo company is wanting to take her vehicle without paperwork. She wants him removed. Officer advised the repo company is going to be taking three of the vehicles that are on this property. Don't complain about 1, or the'll take 3!

11:55 a.m.-Village of D----- caller advised he is a dealer at the gun show in D----- and had to leave his table for a minute. When he returned, he found a Colt 1991 A-1 .45 ACP pistol had been stolen. Officer advised the gun has a 5-inch stainless steel barrel. Gun entered the system as stolen. What is the world coming to when you can't even leave a table full of guns unattended!

6:03 p.m.- C----- caller advised he had a disagreement with his father over what they were going to have for supper. The father has taken off stating he is going to have his son arrested and taken to jail. Officer advised. 6:31 p.m., father came into the office to file a complaint against his son, but he would not fill out a statement. He left rather mad. Dude, don't diss daddies lasagna!

6:59 a.m.- C----- caller advised his 13-year-old daughter hit one of the other kids. Dispatch asked to speak with the child, but she went to her room. Dispatch advised that maybe the daughter should have to stay in her room until she can be nice. Caller was advised about grounding and taking things away as officers cannot discipline children. Nooo comment

1:55 p.m.-R--- County Sheriff's Office requested Chetek ambulance paged for a female subject who has been in a coma for 24 hours and needs to be taken to a hospital. Chetek ambulance en route to -------- Medical Center in R--- Lake. Hello! She's been in a COMA for 24 hours and you just now decided a hospital would be a good idea? Even more dumbfounding? Why not take her to the LOCAL hospital???

8:12 p.m.-C----- caller advised there is a black cat hanging around his residence and it has been biting people. Officer advised the caller released the cat after the bite. They are going to try to live trap the cat and bring it in for shots. Officer also advised the subject that police don't handle cats. But they do store dogs in the back of the truck...

11:34 p.m.-City of C----- P------- Avenue [911] caller hung up. Dispatch called back, no answer. Officer responded to the residence, reported there is a subject who was stabbed, and requested dispatch to page an ambulance. C----- ambulance and first responders paged. 11:44 p.m., officer advised this subject was stabbed in Minneapolis, Minn., and the subject drove back to C----- without reporting the incident or seeking medical attention. Officer will refer this to St. Paul Police Department. Stabbed in Minneapolis, reported in C-----, referred to St Paul PD......... ooh my head hurts trying to figure this one out

11:55 p.m.-City of C----- M---- Street caller advised there are about eight people standing on the east side of the C----- Police Department smoking cigarettes and causing a disturbance. One of the subjects also urinated on the building. Caller advised the subjects have taken off, some on foot, others in a red Jeep. hehe

2:07 a.m.-C----- officer requested an ambulance for a pregnant subject who is experiencing pains. Didn't anyone tell you pregnancy usually ends this way?

5:39 p.m.-C----- -----Street caller advised of a driver of a black truck who sped up to hit a turkey and then grabbed the turkey and put it inside his vehicle and sped away. Officer advised. lol, that's one way to do it!

8:43 p.m.-C----- [911] laundromat caller is yelling that she needs the police there as someone has busted the back off the toilet. Officer advised. lol lol lol

11:28 p.m.-City of C----- B---- Street caller would like to see an officer regarding 25 to 30 juveniles who went across their property. She is very upset and the people are yelling at her. Officer advised this group of people are celebrating something and they are all dressed up in pirate outfits. There are about 50 people involved. They do not seem underage. They are going on the lake. Officer will try to speak with them when they come to shore again. 12:27 a.m., officer advised the pirates have landed at a C----- bar/eating establishment. Pesky pirates!

9:46 p.m.-City of C----- caller requested an officer respond to R------- Elementary School because there are some kids there playing ball and they have the lights on. He pays taxes and doesn't want the lights on over there. Officer advised the kids can be there until 10 p.m., and he will stop and talk to the caller. How dare CHILDREN be at the SCHOOL! Maybe next time they will blow up your mailbox or something productive!

7:03 p.m.-City of C----- caller advised a subject behind the post office appears to be intoxicated and had dropped his pants. Officer advised, no locate. Those darn naked postal patrons are alusive!


7:35 p.m.-[911] P------ Lake caller, who refused to give his name, advised there is a police car traveling at a high rate of speed southbound on USH -- just north of C----- without its emergency lights on. Checked with C----- officer and he is not on USH --. C------- County officers were advised to watch for this vehicle. Calling the police on the police! Genius!


3:58 p.m.-D----- caller requested dispatch to send an officer to pick up his son as he cannot afford to feed him anymore. His son has a warrant from S-------- County. Officer advised. awww how sad!

9:07 p.m.-City of C----- S----- Street caller advised a male subject is in his driveway jumping on and destroying his own vehicle. Information logged. My car is posessed and I must kill it!

2:15 a.m.-S---- Creek ------ Street caller advised his 17-year-old son was playing with a set of handcuffs and put them on his wrists and now they realize they do not have a key. Requested C----- police to unlock him. 3:48 a.m., officer tried keys and drilling and could not get the cuffs off. Subject will have to work it out on his own. Good idea! leave him in the handcuffs, makes your job easier later!

6:42 p.m.-Town of C----- caller advises that someone pulled out his hedge on his lawn and suspects the neighbors. Officer advised and took report. Damn hedge stealing neighbors!

5:35 p.m.-P------ Lake caller advised a car has been parked at the CTH - boat landing west of C----- for the past few days. She saw a guy go down there and not come back. She has seen more crows in the area in the past couples of days ... Officer made contact with the vehicle owners and they are working on getting the vehicle removed. Even the crows hate abandoned cars!

1:39 p.m.-P------ Lake ------ Street caller reported a crow has been in the roadway all day cawing. He thinks it has the symptoms of West Nile virus. Officer advised. Good to know cawing is the first sign of West Nile!

12:32 a.m.-D----- [911] caller thinks some kids are blowing air under her trailer house making dust to come up from the floor and they have cinnamon rolls. She can smell the rolls from outside. She doesn't see anyone though. She states that if dispatch sends an officer to her home, she isn't going to open the door. Officer told to drive by the area. Aaaah the cinnamon rolls will get you busted every time!

11:26 a.m.-D----- caller reported someone put several stickers on his ATV and believes that law enforcement did this. Caller was told this is highly doubtful and an officer will respond. Caller was found to have a child support warrant for over $4,000. Officer en route with subject to jail. Officer also advised there were three new stickers, but they all came off and there was no damage to the ATV. Better pay your child support or the cops will come...... with STICKERS!

3:28 a.m.-City of C----- Darn Republican Street caller advised of five intoxicated subjects playing basketball in the area. Officers advised. Those darn republicans and thier drunken basketball shennanigans! I had to leave the street name for this one to be funny hehe

2:29 a.m.-D---- CTH -- caller about three to four miles south of C----- advised someone in a vehicle struck a cow and it is still alive. Officer advised it was a yearling heifer. 3:09 a.m., officer out at the scene with the other cow and people there will be trying to catch it. Hmmm, something tells me if the cow is running away from you and you need back up to catch it, it's likely fine!

9:51 a.m.-C----- ---- caller reported a stray brown dog in her neighborhood that appears to be sick and is foaming from the mouth. Officer advised the dog is a friendly St. Bernard which naturally drools. Officer contacted the owner of the dog. lol


8:41 a.m.-City of C----- caller advised there is an injured blackbird on the ground flapping its wings on K---- Street. Caller was advised we don't take care of birds. Now if it were CAWING, we'd have a different story

10:24 a.m.-City of C----- L------- Drive caller advised her neighbor just shot snow at her while driving by on a snowmobile. Officer advised. Not SNOW! Stop the insanity!

12:32 p.m.-S---- Creek ------ Street caller reported a couple of pigs in the roadway. Officer advised. Pigs, cows, birds oh my! These animals ought to learn right of way!

7:20 a.m.-P------ Lake caller advised of a bay-colored horse on the roadway in front of their house. Horses too!

4:23 p.m.-C----- caller advised she is stuck in the car wash. C----- police department advised they will contact someone.

5:14 p.m.-C----- caller advised while she was gone and her elderly mother was home a subject, who identified himself as an appraiser from B-----, went through the house and took pictures. The man did not leave a business card when he was done. Caller would like to see an officer. How dare he not leave a business card!

8:57 p.m.-City of C----- officer advised of a call from a female subject who stated she has been talking to a male subject on the Internet and now he is harassing her. Female said this man is a registered sex offender. 9:05 p.m., officer is out on Dallas Street with the offender. Here's a tip! Don't give registered sex offenders your address over the internet!

3:51 p.m.-[911 hangup] C----- caller advised her dog must have stepped on the phone and dialed 911. All is okay at the residence. Talented dog!

7:50 p.m.-[911 hangup] P------ Lake call came in, dialed back and spoke to a male subject and his wife. Their daughter had dialed the wrong number. Parent states they have a daughter who knows everything. When asked if there was trouble with the daughter the parent advised, "No more than usual." How exactly do you dial the wrong number and end up calling 911? I mean especially when you know everything!

6:44 a.m.-[911] D---- caller advised a 70-year-old male is complaining of chest pain for the past 24 hours and he is lying in bed. C----- ambulance and New A----- first responders paged. Again, 24 hours must be the magic number! If you are alive after 24 hours you deserve for us to call you some help! Is this some sick contest?

9:11 p.m.-[911] C----- caller advised of a situation at a supper club/bar establishment where officers were needed to respond now. The call came in from another dining establishment pay phone. Contacted the business where the call originated and was advised there is no situation going on there. Contacted the other business who also advised there is no problem going on there. Officers en route to business where call originated. Officer advised the emergency caller had made a bet with his friend that 911 would still work even if he didn't put quarters in the phone. Officer is mailing a citation to the caller. Yes folks, proof that 911 still works without quarters!

5:03 a.m.-[911] City of C----- caller advised he has a small lump on his back due to possible bug bite. He would like an EMT to come check it out. Caller advised an ambulance would have to respond, we can't just send an EMT out. Caller was told to contact B----- Medical Center to see if they thought he should come in right away and to call dispatch back. Gosh, why don't doctors make housecalls again?

6:03 p.m.-D---- caller advised there is a suspicious vehicle parked back on a driveway into his potato fields off --th Street. Plate lists to a C----- driver. There is an air compressor in the back seat. The caller believes the vehicle has been there for one to two days. Dude, remember that time you lost your car in the potato field?

10:14 p.m.-C----- officer advised another officer has a Rottweiler in the back seat. They are not sure where the dog belongs. 11:09 p.m., officer is en route to Barron pound with the dog. Wait, You aren't going to store it in the back of the truck?

7:07 p.m.-City of C----- cell caller advised she is taking a 5-year-old kid to the hospital and will be speeding to get there. She was not given permission to do so. She then asked for an escort and was denied. Caller was told an ambulance could be paged for her. Caller advised she did not want that and then hung up.

2:43 a.m.-City of C----- caller advised of a couple of subjects inside a convenience store/gas station who are tossing salads around and yelling profanities. The subjects are intoxicated. Officer advised. Well how ELSE are you suppose to get tossed salads?

8:34 a.m.-City of C----- caller advised someone knocked over two "R----- for Sheriff" signs in her yard last night. Officer advised this is an ongoing problem. Yet he won the vote! Maybe his brother was the governor or something.

10:35 a.m.-[911] C----- caller wanted to know if there was anything we could do about a mouse in her house. Caller was advised to set a trap. Caller didn't know if her father-in-law had any. Caller was advised not to call 911 for this type of call and she hung up.

10:45 p.m.-C----- caller would like someone to go check on his brother as he has not been able to get hold of him for over three months. Officer advised the brother has the wrong phone number. Aaaah, it's nice to see such tight knit families.

9:49 a.m.-C----- officer advised he took a report of a female subject walking and dancing and singing on CTH - near G-------. Officer advised the women got into a vehicle as a passenger and traveled in an unknown direction. Walking and dancing and singing? How DARE she practice such lewd behavior! In the middle of the morning no less!

6:57 p.m.-[911] C----- caller advised her 79-year-old husband started himself on fire when he was smoking while on oxygen. The fire is out and he has burns on his face, shoulders and back. Chetek fire department and ambulance paged. Chetek ambulance requested L------- Medical Center-R--- Lake ambulance intercept. It's not easy being king...... of STUPID


8:04 p.m.-[911] City of C----- caller reported his 7-year-old son is missing. Officer advised. The child was found sleeping in his bed. They are Always the last place you look!

12:48 a.m.-City of C----- apartment building owner advised a female subject just left the apartment building and left behind the 5- to 6-year old daughter who is crying. Officer advised he gave the female a warning about leaving the kids alone. A warning?!

2:45 p.m.-C----- caller advised he fell off the toilet and is wedged between the toilet and bathtub. He is not hurt, but can't get up.

11:40 p.m.-C----- caller advised of an auto accident in front of H------- Autobody. No personal injuries. 12:02 a.m., officer en route to jail with subject for operating while intoxicated. I guess if you are going to wreck....... this is a good place to do it!

9:41 a.m.-C------ caller advised a man with a white beard is looking into windows in the neighborhood. Maybe it's santa checking to see if you are being naughty

1:20 a.m.-C------ caller requested an officer stop by her residence to check out a "critter' in one of her bedrooms. She is currently hiding in the bathroom. Officer advised, no locate on the "critter." Meanwhile, across town....

11:50 a.m.-City of C----- cell caller reported she is stuck inside the automatic car wash. Officer contacted the caretaker of the car wash. 11:59 a.m., officer clear as the caller is out of the car wash. You have to wonder if this was the same lady

1:57 p.m.-[911] City of C----- caller is asking for assistance as her bird has flown out of the house and is sitting in a tree. Caller was told the police department would be notified but are not sure what they can do for her. Now, if it were a CRITTER, they'd be right over

8:20 p.m.-L------- Medical Center in R--- L--- advised a Lifeline call came in from a C----- residence that she had fallen and can't get up. C---- ambulance paged. Just too cliche not to give credit to

11:36 p.m.-Village of D----- caller advised she can smell something weird in D----- again. When caller was asked where the smell was coming from she said she does not have any windows open. Caller was told it must be something in her house. Asked her if she could smell it outside, she said she was not going outside. Caller advised the information would be logged as officers so far have not been able to smell this smell in D-----. She said she will be praying a lot tonight. SEriousely....

2:30 a.m.-C----- caller advised she is on P------ Lake and is missing a swimmer. During the conversation, the missing swimmer appeared. Wouldn't be funny but for the way it's written.

6:57 p.m.-Village of C------ caller just witnessed someone steal a goose from the wild. He boxed the wild goose and put it in the back of his truck. Attempted to contact DNR, unable to reach. Sent officer on a wild goose chase, no locate. ROFL I'm serious, I am not altering these aside from the cities/streets

1:38 p.m.-[911] C----- caller stated a female came to the door yelling for help as the cops are chasing her. The subject left, headed south. Officer advised.

10:21 p.m.-Village of C------ gas stations caller advised they had a gas walk-away in the amount of $6.33. The subject left on foot heading southbound with a leaky gas can. Officer followed the track from the leaky gas can to a residence. The suspect is not at that address. 11:22 p.m., officer has male subject in custody for theft.

1:51 p.m.-[911] D---- caller advised that she has seen a bear run across the field. Caller was advised of our non-emergency phone number. She advised that it is a long distance phone call from New A-----. If I had to pay long distance charges every time a bear ran across the field i'd be BROKE!

6:39 p.m.-[911] City of C----- caller wanted to know why the sirens weren't going off because it is hailing in C-----. Caller was told the sirens are not for hail.

9:51 a.m.-[911] Received a 911 call from a B----- caller who stated that they have a large brown goat in their yard. Officers advised, no locate.